I need help on how to beat my strong urges

Hello I am new to this site it looked quite good so thought I would give it a go I am 19 and I have been self harming on and off now for 7yrs and I've also been diagnosed with Depression I started to self harm at about 12 I've had support and I've also done CBT Therapy which helped in the short term I've also used elastic bands ect when my urges are bad but at the moment I've not cut for a couple of weeks and the urges are real strong and I can never seem to be able to beat these urges and I'm scared I'm noticing behaviours comming back that I only did when things get bad I've started looking up videos on youtube which i did in the past when my cutting was real bad its hard i feel like im losing all hope of ever being free of this demon (self harm) Also ive started to carry blades with me outside of the house and thats a thing i use to do when things were bad so im real scared im going to slip back i crave the pain soo bad and i crave to feel the blood trickling down my arms and i crave to feel all of the bad comming out please help me i dont know what to do anymore

Hello Tiffany.
Its good to hear that you are strong enough to be able to stop self harm for a few weeks, but sad that the urges are too strong.
Whenever you get an urge you need to try and do something to take your mind off it, it can be anything really, like going for a walk, writing a poem, listening to happy music, reading a book etc.
Im sorry to hear you have been diagnosed with depression, i know how you feel with depression.. very horrible thing to have and very hard to cope with, you need as much help as you can get to get through depression, there are lots of people out there that can support you through this difficult time, we on this website are here to support you through this and we will be here for you every step of the way.
I am on live chat now if you want a chat? Im also in the chatroom.
Im not sure what time i will be online until though but hope to chat sometime

Take Care
Love Beth
x x

Sorry to hear about the strong urges!
I self harm too, and i get very strong urges, i find them hard to ignore.
I just talk to people when i get them, and they just keep talking to me to take my mind off things, it works
Hope you are ok! x